Ah... I'm going to try to post more. Once a week sounds like a good amount, but I'll try to do more. I feel pretty blessed, and as a writer (yay!) the best way to become better is to write. Use your instrument.
I was pretty excited the other day when singlemomweekly.com contacted me. See, each ripple in the pond creates a bigger ripple, and I appreciate that, but it got me thinking as I do about the bumps in the road. Every bump can stop you, but if you push through it, there is that other side that can give you some momentum. It's like that for runners who have to take a hill at the beginning of a run and then coast down the other side. Everything we do is like that. We just have to make it through the grueling parts and just that one tweet from April at Single Mom Weekly has me moving a little better this week.
That's where my life is now. And just like it is the darkest before the dawn...the bottom of those bumps are easy. It's when you get to the top and can see that you might make it that your body, mind and spirit get weak and you think, "I can't," but "I CAN" and am. This is probably my worst bump yet, and I need that momentum, but I'm getting stronger every day. Of course, I want to be one of those people that doesn't have regrets, but I do. I wish I had built my muscles that are impervious to pain and failure a lot sooner. I've come back from zero so many times before, but never did I have another person's welfare intwined with my success schedule. They say the first five years of a child's life is so important. I wish that I could lavish her for the first five before she's bogged down by school and such. But on the other side I'm so proud that she can tell people, "My Mommy worked with me pulling on her breasts 90% of the time." That would be cool if kids talked that way :-)
Anyway. I'm just glad that I've made a small impact and thanks to April Storm at SingleMomWeekly for reaching out to me. It is definitely part of the light I see at the very very very far end of the tunnel. I don't consider myself a single mom, but I'll give you guys a glimpse of why and how I'm coming to terms of that in my next post.